


Hard to Describe

by NanixErka



Series: Nell and the Company She Keeps [3]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Angst, Dysfunctional Family, Fluff, Gaslighting, Gen, IronDad and SpiderSon, Irondad, Pepperony - Freeform, Platonic Cuddling, Platonic Female/Male Relationships, Platonic Relationships, Self Insert Weekend, i had a lot of fun writing this, mild infinity and endgame refernces, spiderson
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-17
Updated: 2019-01-17
Packaged: 2019-10-11 20:50:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,516
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17454077
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NanixErka/pseuds/NanixErka
Summary: Original title: "Nell's Super Weird Relationship With Tony Stark"Or "Nina writes an extremely self indulgent fanfic where Tony Stark befriends her and validates her life choices"I am expecting no one to read this, honestly.





	1. Chapter 1

If you asked Nell, she’d say they were acquainted. If you asked Tony he’d make a crack about one of her nicknames around the compound and not actually answer you. 

Truth was, their… “friendship” … was just kinda weird. 

Okay, _very_ weird. 

They met through Peter, of course, when the spiderling got in over his head and nearly bled out on Nell’s linoleum floor. She’d used his mask to call for help and Tony Stark himself showed up. Peter lived, thankfully, and Tony mentioned that he’d heard of her. 

“The spiderling is always talking about his life. You come up a lot” he’d shrugged off. Peter got a dozen chocolate croissants for talking her up to a billionaire. 

And then the interview offer came. 

He’d shown up at her apartment with his signature grin and a bottle of a sickly sweet champagne (Peter told him that she hated most alcohol) to offer her a position as an on call nurse at the “Avengers” facility. 

“You’d have to get interviewed by Cho, But we’re confident you’ll get the job” He explained as he took her cheap wine glasses and filled them sparsely with the sparkling liquid 

“Not that I’m not grateful but, why?” 

“Think of it as a thank you for saving the idiot spiderling’s life” The billionaire explained further 

“... Alright then. I’ll sip to that” she joked, picking up a glass and clinking it to his before taking said sip

Life got all the weirder after that. 

She met Colonel Rhodes, Thor (thanks for that, Tony) and Pepper Potts shortly before her interview with the good doctor, and had gotten the job with little fanfare.

The job up there was sparse and mostly included Peter, but it worked out. Plus, the pay made her expensive-ass living in Queens much more affordable. 

But then movie night happened.

It had been innocuous. She’d been called in to assist with treating and helping with a recovering Rhodes, and afterward saw that Peter was up with Tony. 

“It’s lab weekend!” The boy had gushed “We’re gonna work on re-calibrating my web shooters and then-“

“And then we’re watching movies and chilling out cause May told me you got 3 hours of sleep last night.” Tony interrupted 

Peter pouted “I slept in the car!” 

“Doesn’t count” Nell interrupted 

“That’s what Pepper said” Peter crossed his arms 

“How old are you again?”

After that quip fest, Peter had invited her to join them for the movies “It’s basically just like movie night when we do at your place. Just like, with Tony Stark” 

She figured there was nothing to lose. Her quarters was in the general residential area but Tony told he could use a room in the Main suite, brushing off that they used to belong to the others with a “They need some use” 

So she got into her most presentable pajamas (the pants had little Keropis on them), and made her way to what Tony had referred to as the common room. 

The movie of choice to start them off was the original True Grit. Fair enough, she supposed. Peter was in the Hello Kitty pants and “I survived my trip to NYC” shirt he got after the whole deal with the Staten Island Ferry. Tony was wearing matching Hello Kitty pants and a “Baby Metal” shirt. It was honestly surreal. 

They situated themselves on the couch - Peter in the middle to keep the weird from getting overwhelming- and the movie started. 

At some point, she fell asleep. 

It was no secret to anyone that knew her well that she was the textbook definition of a restless sleeper. In fact she was coming to find that save for maybe Daph- her best friend- everyone she knew slept like that. She knew that Peter was a restless sleeper, May too. They’d often wake up in a bizarre tangled mess after watching too many episodes of the Nanny on Sunday nights. Nell had known that it was bordering on weird to be that okay with snuggling up to your friends, but she was lucky to have equally over affectionate ones

Didn’t make things any less weird when she woke up resting on the chest of Tony stark. 

Stark- for his part- didn’t seem interested in the extra 180 pounds on him, and was reading an article on a “Rouge Avengers” sighting in Singapore using the fancy holograph tech in his phone. 

“You’re awake” He stated casually “Its been about 3 hours” 

“.... I am so sorry” 

“For what? We’re all the restless type, it seems. Peter’s still asleep, by the way” 

That was when she felt an arm around her midsection and looked to her side, where Peter had somehow, miraculously, wedged himself between the couch and Stark, seemingly to be hugging them both 

“..... Still sorry” 

“Nothing to be sorry for. Don’t think about it so hard, you’ll give yourself a headache” 

She had the urge to scowl but suppressed it, and, in a moment of boldness, rested her head back down, and fell back to sleep. 

That was a fun story to tell Daph the next time they had lunch, that was for sure. 

The next time Nell saw Pepper Potts she decided to bring it up 

“Hey uh, miss Potts?” 

“Hm?”

“Is Stark…. touchy?” She asked as she read over tax papers. When the CEO of a Fortune 500 company offers to help you with your now super complicated taxes , you don’t say no. 

“... This is about that movie night 2 weeks ago, isn’t it?” 

“Yyyyyup” Nell popped the "P" 

“The short answer is yes” she answered, amused “He’s very tactile. You’d never know it with how he parades around” 

“He kinda gives off a “don’t touch me unless I touch you” vibe” Nell admitted 

“And once he does expect it all the time.” She rolled her eyes “He’s been like that with Rhodey since I met him. He leans, hugs, all that stuff. Congrats on joining the club” 

“I’m assuming that talking about touchy feely Tony Stark is not encouraged?” 

“Assuming anyone even believes you” Pepper pointed out

“That’s fair” Nell assumed.

After that she stopped thinking so hard about it. They weren’t precisely “friends” in her estimation, but they were friendly, and if that friendly involved occasionally getting leaned on while replacing Peter’s stitches as he tiredly scolded him for the billionth time or group movie nights where the billionaire was lying partially on her and mostly on Pepper once the tired group passed out, who the hell even cared? 

But then … The Decimation happened. 

When she’d been contacted by Pepper to the compound upstate, she’d rushed up and been reunited with Thor, and they’d been hesitant to leave another’s side out of sheer paranoia. 

When a spaceship carrying, someone called “Carol Danvers”, a blue alien android and Tony Stark landed in the outskirts, Nell had been there, and helped him get hooked up to saline. 

And when she’s learned the fate of Spider-Man, she’d burst into tears

Thor had been a great comfort there, but she knew she had to talk to Tony. Rhodes stopped by to let them know that a Wakandan ship was picking up a variety of people to bring them there- including Happy, and May. He requested that Nell be the one to tell Tony. He needed to know there was more than just us here- they they haven’t lost everything.

She understood, and while Thor tried to cajole his way into the matter. Nell promised she wouldn’t take longer than 15 minutes. 

Tony’s room was dark as night, save for the light of the arc reactor he’d attached to his chest. 

“Tony?” She voiced at the doorway. “I’m coming in” 

There was no response from the man, who was staring at the ceiling 

“The queen of Wakanda sent a ship to pick up whoever is … left” she struggled to form the right sentences “ Mappy, and May have been picked up” 

That elicited his eyes looking to her, but not much more of a reaction

“We’re regrouping, Tony. That’s how everyone is putting it.” She continued “... I’ll tell May, if you don’t-“

“No” 

She finally looked back at him as he sat up “Her kid is dead ‘cause of me. I tell her” 

Nell would have huffed if she had it in her “Okay” 

She put a hand on his arm, and he responded by reaching out and gripping her in a hug so tight it startled her. She didn’t say anything. What could she have said anyway? 

She returned the hug, a form of calm coming over them. 

Then her watch beeped

“... What kind of weird ass alarms are you setting?” Tony asked.

“I told Thor I wouldn’t take longer than 15 minutes” she explained 

“You two finally an item now?” 

“Don’t think so” she managed an awkward smile before there was a knock at the door “That’d be him.” She separated “I’ll see you later, okay? Rhodes is gonna fetch you for food, I’d reckon” 

He nodded “Lemme know if Point Break gets to be too much” 

“Impossible” she answered with a straight face. The almost-smile that elicited was worth it 

Well… then things went completely bonkers. 

Time travel and fighting and stress and _oh my god Tony are you trying to kill yourself??_

But in the end, they won

And somehow… shit got even _weirder_

For the first month, everyone, and that means _everyone_ lived at the damn compound upstate

And watching the usually aloof Tony Stark just, lean on, and hug, and link arms with pretty much everyone in the damn place was so weird, Nell just had to believe that it was just some sort of post-trauma thing. But as a touchy feely person herself - who, more often than not was also leaning on and hugging people - she wasn’t really one to judge. 

He’d taken to linking arms with her while she was doing things, asking “What’s up buttercup?” In a way that reminded her distantly of her mother. She’d quite enjoyed it, though occasionally Thor would just come up behind the duo and lift them both, teasingly asking if Tony was trying to “steal his girl” 

“I’m old enough to be her dad don’t even joke about that” Tony had cringed 

Nell, for her part, just ended up a flustered mess as the insinuation of being “Thor’s girl”

She usually ended up between Peter and Thor on the couch most nights, but sometimes, when everyone started falling asleep (and every single fucking one of them was a restless sleeper she swore to whatever gods exists), she’d wake up with Thor being her big spoon and Tony as her little spoon (and Pepper being his little spoon). 

It was actually pretty nice. 

But life moves on, and Nell eventually went back to Queens 

Her “life” now involving her friends with superpowers and a lack of personal space

Not that she really minded


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Post Canon development

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It felt right to split it up. Feels better as a whole

She hadn’t been answering her phone 

That in and of itself was a complete anomaly. They knew she was alive and fine (She’d fully consented to wearing the vitals-tracking AVENGERS edition Stark Watch- with a Storm-Breaker design of course). But she never didn’t answer her phone. Not unless she was asleep. 

When asked, Thor shrugged “She told me the reason for her radio silence in confidence, and seeing that we are finally dating, I won’t be betraying that trust” and that had been the end of that. 

Even Peter and May weren’t being very forward 

“This time of year is always off for her” May had said “Give her time. She needs to recuperate” 

“From what, Thanksgiving?” Sam had asked as they ate popcorn 

“Yes” Peter had answered, the glare he aimed at Sam had promptly shut the man up. 

Well they had been of no help, and the Christmas party was coming up very soon with no RSVP from her. So, Tony decided to pay everyone’s favorite nurse a visit 

When he’s shown up to her apartment he wasn’t super sure what to expect. What he got was entrance into an almost creepily clean apartment (It was usually homey and lived in feeling), with Nell sitting at her kitchen table, staring at a letter before looking over at her intruder. Her eyes were red, but she didn’t look like she’d been crying. 

“...... What’s up buttercup? The Avengers haven’t heard from you” 

She didn’t answer, the letter in her hands nearly crumpling and ripping in her grip 

“... You know a good way to tell someone you never want to see them again?” She asked after a prolonged pause.

“... The straight forward approach is usually the best bet there” He answered, taking the conversation as an invitation to walk in 

“... And if you want to be a petty bitch about it?” 

He leaned his hip against the table, eyeing the half-finished letter and the pen in her hair

“Well then you don’t contact them at all” 

She sighed deeply

“Whats this about, Nurse Joy? I didn’t think you hated anyone.” He crossed his arms as he looked down, catching a few words on the letter

“... I don’t think I hate them” She muttered 

“No one’s seen you since Thanksgiving” 

“Well i didn’t want to be seen” 

“Are you going to explain why or-” 

“Drop it” She practically hissed. 

“... Nope” he answered “Start talkin’ Bubblegum, we’ll be here a while if you’re quiet” 

“Really laying on the nicknames, huh?” She muttered

“Trying to lighten the mood” He commented with a shrug, going over to her fridge and spotting a bottle of sparkling grape cider “Humor me” 

“....” She watched quietly as he poured two glasses of the nonalcoholic drink, and placed one in front of her “.. Thanksgiving was a disaster” 

“A ‘house burned down’ disaster?” 

“... A ‘no one was happy to see me and was actively hostile’ disaster” 

Tony furrowed his brow “I heard that correctly, right? Your family, half of which died in the Decimation, who knew you were actively working with earth’s mightiest heroes to help save the damn universe… didn’t want you there?” 

“... It was… more like they ….” she sighed, grumbling something about ‘bullshit’ before sipping on the drink. “I walked in and they all just started going at my damn throat” 

“About what?” 

“ _Everything_ ” She stressed. “My dad wouldn’t stop mentioning that he had a friend who had a nursing position near where he lived available and to kept having to tell him that i wasn’t moving out of Queens just to get paid less and be further away from my secondary job… I think I broke him after the fourth time… He just… He called ungrateful.. And when i asked for what he went “for my help” and it … devolved from there” 

“His help from what?” 

“Despite the end of the goddamn world he seems to think that I am struggling day by day to get by” She further explained “That I’m miserable because I’m so far away from him and the family when-”

“It’s the opposite” he finished

“... I was never happier than when i moved into this apartment” She commented. 

Tony wasn’t sure he’d ever seen Nell open up like this 

“What worse is that everyone - everyone was pressuring me to move back to Jersey, to be closer to home and I just, I can’t do that… I moved out at 20 after getting my nursing degree and .. I refuse. I know what will happen, i know what comes next” She almost growled “Regression, going back to the life I hated so, so much” 

The redness in her eyes was going to turn into actual tears very soon. Tony scooted his chair awkwardly closer to Nell, and slung an arm around her shoulders

“.... Pepper is great at writing letters when we end partnerships with companies. Maybe she can help.” he offered “Scratch that, she definitely will. I can’t see her saying no to helping out here” 

“.... Thank you” was all he got as a response. He’d take it. 

It took a little coaxing, but he got the two of them over to her couch, draped in a gaudy and over detailed quilt she’d bought at goodwill right after moving. Peter had called it her “feel good” blanket so he figured it’d be useful, after turning on the TV and putting it on low, they watched Chopped reruns for about two hours before she spoke again. 

“.... Am I a bad person?”

Tony raised a brow at the question “For not wanting to go back to a shitty family situation?” 

“For abandoning them” she clarified. He looked at her and saw that she wasn’t looking back, her gaze stuck on the TV “Running away instead of facing my problems” 

The billionaire wasn’t sure what to say to that. 

“... Maybe you were” he admits “Maybe you were cowardly and bad for leaving them behind instead of facing those problems” 

He could feel her trembling 

“But you’re not bad now” he squeezed her a bit “You’re right up in my top five of “least worst people I know”, you know. Up there with Peter and Lang” 

“As in Scott Lang?” She nearly laughed “What a motley crew” she mused. 

He grinned slightly. “People change, Nell. You aren’t who you used to be, and in your case.. that’s a good thing” 

The conversation mostly ended there. And really, that was more than fine. 

\--

When Tony and Pepper had announced Peppers pregnancy, Nell hadn’t even hesitate in signing up for an accelerated Midwifery course. 

The whole course was supposed to take 18 months- she finished and graduated with what was called the “knowledge” degree in 7 and a half. 

“I won’t be the one delivering but I’d rather know about everything that's coming” She’d explained to Tony one day after her “graduation”. 

Some deep part of Tony was so touched by this. 

And then little Morgan was born. 

7 pounds and 6 ounces, with dark eyes and light, wispy hair atop his tiny head. 

He’d hired Nell as Peppers personal live-in assistant nurse pretty much immediately. 

Pepper had never been more relieved when a familiar face walked in to help with the baby. Tony smiled too. It was good to know that their little family wasn’t so little these days. 

 

One Sunday, with the sun low in the sky as the day began to end, and Tony had left the lab to check on the baby, catching Nell with little Morgan in her arms, singing to the little tyke in the living room. 

“ _Dear little Morgan what to say to you? You have his eyes, your mother’s uncle’s name_ ” She sung to the tune of “Dear Theodosia”. Tony found himself touched and amused that she had appropriated the song to sing to his son.. About him. What a way to fuel his ego. 

The song continued, until the second verse started, when she was joined by Peter - who honestly the older man had forgotten was there

“ _Oh, Morgan when you smile he is undone, you’re-his son!_ ” Peter sung -so close to off key it was charming 

The two traded bars as the song continued and Tony’s throat tightened 

_"His father wasn’t around” (“His father wasn’t around”)_

_“But I swear that he’ll be around for you”_

_“He’ll do whatever it takes” (“He’ll make a million mistakes”)_

_“He’ll make the world safe and sound for you”_

Some of the replaced lyrics didn’t scan perfectly, but he took their focus as an opportunity to sneak up on them, and wrapped his arms around the both of them as he sung the last line

_“Someday”_

Peter had been startled. Nell hadn’t. Tony briefly squeezed the arm around the spider kid and let go 

“Go to the lab and get your web shooters prepped. The new fluid is ready for testing.” 

The bumbling teen (“almost an adult!!!”) floundered off towards the elevator, leaving Tony with Nell and his sleeping son. He looked down at Morgan, who was resting comfortably on Nell’s chest. 

“That was so cheesy I think it made me lactose intolerant, by the way” 

“Peter and I were saving that for father’s day, you know” She teased. 

“Eh, I love it anyway. Just like i love both of you” He squeezed her shoulder a little, leveling a brief kiss to her hair before letting go “Now gimmie my son, i’m gonna put him to bed” 

“Heh, alrightie old man” Nell handed over the infant “Love you too, by the way” She leaned over and kiss his cheek after the baby had been exchanged “I’m headed back to the apartment. I’ve got a date with Thor tonight” 

“Tell him if he doesn’t make this Facebook official soon I’m setting you up with Sam” Tony managed to say with a mostly straight face. Nell stifled a laugh

“See you later, Tony” She grabbed her coat as she left, waving with a smile. 

Tony smiled back and turned towards the hall, eyes on his little Morgan. 

Yeah, his relationship with the nurse was definitely a little strange. 

But- like with most of the people in his weird family- he wouldn’t have it any other way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> bug me on tumblr @ doodleimprovement :)

**Author's Note:**

> Wanna bug me with questions? I'm on Tumblr over at doodleimprovement, and on Twitter i'm wiltingdaisy94


End file.
